Dear Dad

Lately, I’ve been thinking a great deal about my dad. He passed away in July, 1997.

Maybe this being his birthday week has great influence. Maybe his appearance in recent dreams is one situational play on another.

Everytime I look in the mirror at my naked eyes, I see dad’s eyes. His eyes were brown and round. Most of the DeMars have eyes that are… just like our father’s. We were ten kids going strong, and everyone knew Nubs’ kids.

Dad had a thing about the eyes. I remember when my older daughter was in infancy, and dad commented on how she looked him straight in the eye. I recall Dad saying, “you’re looking at things through rose colored glasses.” Contrarily, as dad aged, his vision failed with cataracts, and other complications.

Norbert, (aka Nubs) had three brothers: Art(Arthur), Melvin, Bud(Bernard) and one sister, Eleanor. What catches my attention is that, recently, as I look at myself in the mirror, I see Aunt Eleanor.

Aunt Eleanor and Uncle Ed had a house on Lake Erie. We lived in Toledo and would sometimes visit and swim in the Lake. I was maybe four or five. Aunt Eleanor was a very ugly looking woman; she had a really ugly face. I remember a moment in time, when I looked at her, and thought: that is an ugly woman. At such a young age, I engaged the thought, that this was the female version of my dad’s side of the family: that I could look like that.

Aunt Eleanor and Uncle Ed traveled. And they both died in Japan. My young memory recorded that Aunt Eleanor died while in Japan, and, Uncle Ed brought the body back to the States, but returned to Japan, only to die there, himself. Dad talked about shipping bodies.

I wish I had spent more time with Dad in his later years. The little bit of time that I did spend, I love and cherish. He was a good man.

Happy Birthday (would be 90th b‘day) ,

My Dear Dad.

Norbert Joseph DeMars

Born June 10, 1918