There’s a difference between making love and having sex. This was one of those nights in which we were making love. I once read that when two people hug, the heart chakras can unite, and spin together like wheels on a finely crafted time piece. Lying heart to heart I could feel the surge of pur emotion that seemed to rise from some unknown deep reservoir. He’s a good man, I thought, as I lay there. He had missed me, and lovemaking was an expression of that. It was Sunday night, and we both had work the next day. Sarah was snug in her crib. The room was dark, and Pete began to snore.
I stared blindly at the ceiling. The streetlight cut through the leaves of the false banyan tree, choreographing shadows in the small bedroom. I had spent the past three nights in a hotel in Merida, Mexico. My friend Barbara and I joined a group of folks from the spiritualist camp in Cassadega, Florida. We visited the Mayan ruins in Uxmal, Mexico and attended seminars held by our host, Dr. Sekunna. It was the last weekend in August, 1988, and we were all to meet at Miami International Airport.
I drove the old Merc and picked up Barbara at her place in North Fort Myers. We started down theinterstate, and Barbara lit up a joint. It was early in the morning, and I was feeling a bit anxious and the joint sort of put me over the top. I had to get off the interstate. I pulled onto 41 and proceeded along that route to Miami airport.
As I drove along 41, I became increasingly paranoid. I was behind a dump truck on a two lane road and I would not pass. I sensed Barbara’s impatience. She offered to drive, and I gladly relinquished the wheel. We talked about the upcoming trip, and the people from Cassadega, FL, a small town just north east of Orlando, which mirrors a city of the same name in New York State. Barbara and I often would take a day trip and have psychic readings . This was the first time we had joined them on this sort of venture.
As we headed south and east on Tamiami Trail, I starred into the large puffy clouds that jetted out against the bright blue sky. Barbara mentioned the Mayan practice of sacrificing virgins. I can’t for the life of me understand what exactly happened next, but I suddenly felt completely removed from my physical being. I heard a high-pitched ringing in my ear and I saw those puffy clouds just race across the blue sky.
That high-pitched, in-my-ear ringing and the feeling of being detached occurred again during this trip. The next occurrence was during our morning seminar with Dr. Sekunna. His lectures included topics such as creative visualization and aura reading. I sat in a folding chair, one among two dozen others, listening to this man speak about the aura and how to recognize it. I sat listening, when the ringing began. I could see the others, I heard Dr. Sekunna, but I felt completely detached. What snatched me back was the good Doctor speaking directly to me: “There!” he said, pointing at me. “You felt that energy, didn’t you?!” I was dumbfounded that he was looking at, and speaking directly to me. I stammered some sort of “ I dunno” because I didn’t know; I didn’t know what I was experiencing, let along how anyone else would know.
We had an afternoon of past life regressions. It was the coolest thing I’d ever experienced. I understand that people spend huge money to have individual past life regressions. I had no idea that this concept even existed until this time. We participated in a group regression, stretching out on mats on the floor of the hotel’s conference room. Dr. Sekunna brought us into relaxation through suggestion and instruction in rhythmic breathing. He brought us back to “a mutually agreeable place and time.” After each regression, we would all discuss our various experiences. My friend Barbara had a lot to share, as her experiences were quite exalted; even regal.
I recall that in one of these three experiences, I was male in a place and time very much as I imagine it would have been like on Atlantis. In another, I was a woman in colonial America. Even now I hold those images very keenly in my memory much as I hold true life experiences.
The next day, we took the VW bus out to the ruins in Uxmal. We bumped along narrow, dusty roads past mud-brick shacks with wide eyed brown kids staring back at us. I sat in the very back of the bus, catching soft-spoken comments from my traveling companions as I practiced power of the mind to offset the repercussions from Montezuma’s revenge.
We gathered and assembled as any tour group would, with our Dr. Sekunna taking the lead and arranging our admission and guide. It was humid and overcast in late August, and the grasses and trees were so lush and green. At one point along the walk, Dr. Sekunna told me that when the time came, he would instruct me as to what I should do. I nodded in agreement without really knowing what he was talking about. It was only later when at the Palace of the Governor, he pointed out to me a certain chamber that I then understood.
We were gathered in the foreground of the Palace of the Governor. The structure rose a foreboding number of narrow steps into an area that appeared to house various chambers.
With the aid of our guide, Dr. Sekunna explained the role that this structure played in the Mayan culture. He then called me aside and pointed out a particular chamber, up the stairs in the far right corner. He said that I should go in there, and practice what I had learned.
The dutiful person that I was becoming didn’t question. I climbed the narrow, steep stairs of the Palace of the Governor, and entered the afore-designated chamber. It was creepy. It was, of course, dark and damp. I was wearing a plastic poncho from the afternoon sprinkles. It was hot. I guessed I was supposed to meditate…slow breathing ..in to the count of four…slowly exhale out the mouth.. All I could think about was the rubble around me. Was there vermin? Yuck it was creepy. I began to cry in despair. Our instructor had singled me out. I was to have some great experience here in this mystical magical chamber in this Mayan palace, and all I could think about was how creepy it was.
With tears streaming my face, I walked out. I turned blindly and walked along the outer perimeter, until I came to a ledge on the west side. I so hoped nobody could see me. I couldn’t make any sense of my thoughts. I was crying but I couldn’t understand why. I felt very, very desperate. As I sat there, letting the tears drip from my eyes, I looked up. The sky was that same brilliant blue with the prominent white clouds. The sky then began to race. The clouds spun. I heard a voice that did not come through my ears. The clouds darted, the sky spun, my ears rung. “Michelle” I heard, “Teach Barbara humility.”
I knew immediately. There was no question in my mind that a higher authority just gave me a directive. But teach Barbara humility?! I would prefer to spend 40 days in a desert! I sat on the ledge for awhile thinking about Barbara. She’s a Leo by astrological sign, and her physical appearance is very typical of the sign: Tall, thin, with very long, thick brown hair. Barbara would brush it, and toss it so casually, that you couldn’t help but think of a Lion’s mane. Barbara was talented and had a confidence that few possessed – and she had an ego.
I rejoined the group, and we finished the tour, complete with an evening light show in the courtyard. I couldn’tget my mind off the afternoon. It was unlike anything I had ever experienced. We returned to the hotel in Merida. We talked through the night about our various experiences, thoughts, impressions. The words “Teach Barbara humility” nagged at me.
Gradually I began to share my afternoon experiences with her. As the drama unfolded, I cautiously approached the telling of the Divine Directive. I relayed it all, leaving out just one word. I said that I heard the words: “Michelle. Teach humility.” We talked about humility and shared insights and opinions, and it was the first of what would be many long conversations between us for many years.
We returned to Miami and to Fort Myers and I returned Barbara to her house. I felt like a changed person. I returned home and eagerly held my baby and delighted in being with my husband. I lay in bed watching the shadows dance around the room. I heard the escalating snoring next to me. My body felt warm. I just conceived a child, I said to myself. HaHa!! I silently exclaimed!! And this will be a very special child!! This child is a gift from God!! I smiled broadly - I broke into a wide grin!! And then I thanked God for the gift He had just given me. Wrapped in the warmth from this new Divine Spark, I tucked my pillow under my head and fell softly to sleep.